I know I have been missing in action for awhile, this has been one of the hardest times emotionally for me. it is so different when there is tough times and you have one safe spot to go hide, we had no where, well at one point the tent and then the motel, but nor really quiet time without my kids or even my husband to think about all the little and huge things going on. I feel blessed that our trial did not last as long as it could have but at the same point it has taught me that life can change in a moment and there is not much you can do but hold on as tight as you can to get over the bump.
The sad part is through this all I have drawn closer to the man that I call my higher being, I now he is helping us, the sad part to it all is that it has left me rethinking where life is too and church all that fun, I have some amazing friends at church that I love so much but there is alot of people I feel looked down upon, I hope that will change or we will change to make it work, I know what I know and I believe what I do, but weather we go to church everyweek or not does not make us bad people....just need to figure it all out again, it is that adjusting, now granted I have not been to the new "ward" so we will see!
I Love my God and I know he is amazing......it is the people that we have to remember that we are all not perfect even me.....I know I am not without a doubt.
Anyways, new topic.....We did get into our new house last week... a week today, it has been a great feeling to have something that is mine well ours! It is taking some time to get things the way I want as we went form a duplex to a very small 3 bedroom townhouse that does not even really have a basement so what we have done is put all 3 kids in the same room and we are using the one room for a play room and therapy room as we need a place for that. We do have a crawl spot which gives us lots of storgae which is nice. It is just going to take some time to get use to the new world we have.....it is all coming together.
Emotionally, everyone will live through this all.....it is making us stronger some how......i love my family they mean the world to me, even when they make me feel like I am going to pull my hair out.
2 comments:
Hugs Christine! Hope you can see the light at the end of this next trial of yours soon. Don't forget that ALL pain you feel weather it be emotional, mental, or physical was felt FIRST by Jesus Christ Himself as he suffered in the Garden for every one of our pains......even before we were born. He loved us.....YOU...... that much. He KNOWS what you are going through. And you must be one of those special spirits to be going through the "refiners fire". That means the Lord KNEW how much potential you have to be a member of one of his powerful armies. You can do this.
P.S. Don't let anyone at church make you feel like you shouldn't be going to church. You know and I know that we go to church for HIM.....not for anyone else. I know the scriptures command us to attend church "Meet together oft".........and that is so that we can learn and grow with one another as we each go through all our own trials.......but for the most part.....we go there to worship HIM and to renew our convenants with HIM as we partake of HIS sacrament. So don't let anyone else get you down. Hint: We like to sit on the front row and concentrate on why we are there. I know that is not possible with your little children, but metaphorically you can pretend you are on the front row. For HIM. ; D Hugs!
you are a good strong person christine. and you don't have the time to worry about what other people think of you. it's just not worth your time when you have 3 beautiful children to take care of. it is such a tough road but you have your own personal relationship with H.F and that is what is important, keeping that relationship with him strong. i think of you often and hope things come together for you in your new place and ward.
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