things I have been thinking about

okay I know I keep saying I am going to update my life to you all but it has been a little crazy, most mom's love summer, I personally hate summer, because it means my kids are off there "normal" world, it means I must do more activities to keep them somewhat normal, which really means this is more work for me than them being at school, yes I do love my kids but I am not a super organized craft fun mom, some mom enjoy having every moment of there day planned and my kids belong to that mom but I am not! But on the up note school almost starts only....a month left really! hahahaha

I want to say on the up movement it has been a summer of eye opening for me, as we moved down here I was very very much burnt out, and so I had to let others step in and help me, now anyone who knows me knows this is the hardest thing in the world for me because it is much easier to do it myself because I won't have to do it again! especially when it comes to my kids, did you know there is even a certain way to make KD and if you do it wrong the next 10times it is front of you it is still going to be wrong no matter what anyone says. And did you know if you scream loud enough cake does come before dinner! back to my eye opening moment, with me being burnt out and let others step up and help it has taught me about my box I live in, I have done so much in my life to help me have a calm smooth live with my kids, great right? NO because the "autism OCD" has taken over my life, I can now see it which is nice because I am not sure how many actually see it and see they need to change it but it is helped me to see that I need to work on this a bit more!
Our plan of different is okay for the summer has been working for the most part, as it is helping them adjust to many things, we moved here and are living with the Wendy and Philip for those that did not know that, it was a good adjustment in the way that they got something they are some what comfortable with and then sooner or later we will get our own place again! When we are not sure but it will all come together in the Lords time, but being here has helped David and I build our relationship a bit more as we can take the well needed breaks and when my health is not all there I can sleep and no one really says anything and my kids are still taken care of, one day we will figure out my health but it is all a step in the right direction.

I did want to make one last comment before I end this post this is a little different........

I have been thinking alot about where life has been as we are almost at our 2 yr mark of Dallin being assessed for his language delay, and every time I here someone else is going through this world it makes my heart skip a beat and pause and almost cry because I remember the pain that I went through and how I would love for no one else to go through this but it is just not going to happen so all I can say to this family that is going through this all, pray and pray some more for strength, Heavenly Father is not giving you anything you can not handle even through right now I know you feel that way, and if you ever need to talk or cry feel free to call. I know it can be hard to not feel like the bad mom who can't control our kids the right way at church and in real life! my prayers are with you!